Virtual Reality Here I Come (Star Tribune, Mar. 27, 2016): Wherein I say goodbye to real reality forever.
My Toilet Succumbed to St. Paul's Crumbling Infrastructure—and Yours Could Be Next (Star Tribune, Dec. 29, 2015)
How The Machines Will Take Over (Star Tribune, May 23, 2015): How I'd take over the world if I were artificially intelligent.
My Retirement Plan: Happy Math (Star Tribune, Jan. 7, 2015): In which I explain the extraordinary economic principles behind "happy math."
Fifty Shades at Home (The Morning After, Feb. 17, 2015): What happens when a middle-aged man tries a few tricks from 50 Shades of Grey?
How Should We Respond to North Korea's Attack on Sony? (The Morning After, Dec. 22, 2014)
Thoughts on Fargo (The Morning After, Apr. 17, 2014): In which I explain the truth about Minnesota to outsiders.
Will Your Brain Explode if You See the Book of Mormon? (The Morning After, Feb. 7, 2013)
Fear Factor (Front and Center, Oct. 2013): Halloween costumes that would really scare adults.
My Dog Reviews the Walker Art Center's International Cat Festival (The Morning After, Aug. 29, 2013)
What the Fair Needs is Rides that Truly Reflect Minnesota (Front and Center, Aug. 18, 2014)